What happened last night.

These things happen a lot in this part of town. Thieves. Robbers. Many of them are just young men who should be out doing something useful instead of churning out excuses of bad government and stifling economy. Even if it’s konkere they are lifting,they will be able to feed daily and even grow muscles. If only the government would build a good stadium, I think they can practice wrestling there.
Anyway, I was really enjoying my sleep o. Honestly ehn, I’ve never being as tired as I was yesterday. We were in the office throughout trying to settle the Celine Mako crises{all these spoilt celebrities}. The creative director was really on our neck. And so, I was really tired when I got home. So, you can imagine how my eyes popped out like that grape that grows in our backyard in the village when I heard Iya Sunkanmi’s scream in the dead of the night. My dear, you know when people say ‘pool of sweat’, that’s what I woke up in. And I swear, I was sweating in my boxers too,because I don’t know what else could have soaked it like that.
Iya Sunkanmi screamed again o,then I heard doors opening. Somehow sha, I got up from the bed. . . . I didn’t make any noise o. Then with my knees and hands on the floor, I moved like that my grandmother’s black cat and crawled my way to the sitting room. Did I mention that there was no light? PHCN!! That’s how I banged my head on the big center table. All the pain rushed through my body and wanted to fly out in a scream but I quickly covered my mouth o. If you see my head now ehn, like that flashlight hunters wear on their head.

Finally, I got to the window. At least, if I could see what was happening outside, I would know if I should just stay down on the rug or lock myself in the toilet.
Then it happened. Gba,gba,gba on my door o. Gbim, gbim, gbim again o!! That’s how I was hearing that saworoide in my head o, I swear that’s how my heart was beating my chest. It’s as if eating beans at night is really bad for me like you said because a bad rumble was now going on in my stomach. Kai, god knows my boxers have been through better nights.

As my baba in high places will have it, the next voice I heard was that of Sunkanmi’s father saying his wife was in labour. Of course, I did not believe at first o. Ah! All these thieves and their tricks. But it was true. I looked out through the window and saw the man peeping in,as if he was not sure I was in. But he had seen my car. So I got up and went to open the door. He begged me to drive them to the hospital.
I was tired, but how could I refuse to do it. You see, baba Sunkanmi is a good man,a good landlord. Anytime I’m in this town, he let’s me use his BQ and I only pay a little for it. So, I had to help him.
So at about 2am,with the sky as black as that goat we killed for christmas last year, I drove them to the hospital.
My dear, you see, in the midst of all these hullabaloo, I forgot that I had left my phone to charge in baba Sunkanmi’s house when he put on his generator. So even though I got back from the clinic around 7am this morning, I had to wait till he got back at 11am before I could pick it up. And I forgot to put it off. I saw your 23 missed calls and I called back immediately but you know how network is. That’s why I’m sending this email. I have to go back to work now,the director is making us work all day today. I promise to be back tomorow. We will have sunday lunch at your family house. Remember, I love you so much. XoXo. :-*
¤ ¤ ¤ ¤ ¤ ¤ ¤
He hit the send button and rested his aching back on classic recliner in the hotel room. The club was mad fun last night. Yes,he slipped on that drunk girl’s vomit and banged his head on the shiny tiles, young girls that can’t keep a good drink down. Mtchew! Wasted the money he spent on the Moet; but her skills in more important matters made up for it some hours later in his hotel room.
Amanda would believe him jare,why won’t she? It’s not like she’s psychic and what he’d sent to her was ever so believable,easier to swallow than what really happened last night.

14 thoughts on “What happened last night.

  1. Loool, hmmmm, interesting story. But the guy will get caught if Amanda decides to find out the truth from Mama and Baba Sunkanmi themselves


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