Undecided

Something borrowed.

Enjoy………

This is the last lap of another journey. In a matter of days, we would be giving our last salute and dropping the green caps regardless of how hot the sun will be. The one year of compulsory service to Nigeria is over and I declare myself free from the routine.

Now I lie on my bed and just let myself feel the moment. The curtains cast a thick shadow keeping the fingers of the intruding sun rays stuck on my window. I turn the music up and let my mind give in to the levitation aroused by the fine words of these rock gurus. My head is clearer. There is a quiet that I relish.

Now I am wondering about certain issues of the heart, which is conspicuously important in my position. It is the opinion of some school of thought that these issues are tied to the emotional phase of those involved. The young ones.

The issues of my own heart sometimes feels Choate, but I know that they are actually just part of a phase; like a ball of strings that keeps growing even to my disbelief. I am considering external opinions and sayings from different quarters. I am proud to say that I have proved myself. . . and “them” – wrong. That is what I believe.

I actually do not know what my mind is trying to achieve in this current wandering mood. This might be weird; but I think that mind has a mind of its own. Because, right now, I am wondering if I actually have a say in its own musing.

But I won’t interrupt it.

Lets just the only reason why I am not switching off this mode is that I am quite hoping that in the end, I will make something out of it.

Who knows, I might find answers to questions I have not dared to ask.

The dynamics of the current wandering state brings me back to this thought. What will I be doing this time next week. Will I be on my bed? Will i be out partying with friends?! What will it be. It is of course futile to try to guess the events that will play out that day. That is beyond what the human mind can grasp. As my dearest partner would say “whatever will be, will be”. Even though I scold her for thinking such thoughts and saying them out-loud. I would gladly subscribe to that idea for now, at least for that day!

Let’s just hope that in the midst of these celebration, we would not be carried away, but actually reflect on how far we’ve come and how far we still have to go.

Oladoyin Amos Omotayo.Oladoyin Omotayo

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